whobix

  • Home
  • Tools
    • The WHOBIX CUBE
    • The MVP Model
    • The D.I.R.T.I. Truth
  • Student Testimonials
  • Blog
  • Home
  • Tools
    • The WHOBIX CUBE
    • The MVP Model
    • The D.I.R.T.I. Truth
  • Student Testimonials
  • Blog

Visit www.BrettWGould.com today.
You can read current blog posts
that will encourage and inspire you!

I failed out of college. This is my story...

5/6/2015

0 Comments

 
Picture
I failed out of college.

In the spring of 1994 I received a letter telling me, due to my academic standing, I had failed out of the University I was attending. But I knew it was coming long before it arrived. Within a few short weeks of stepping onto campus as a freshman in the Fall of 1993, this ball of yarn was already starting to unravel.

I felt like a failure.

I suppose that isn't much of a story, in and of itself. Others have been where I was, and others will be in the future. So, why am I sharing this? Because others don't have to. Because I have made it my life's work to not "waste my pain". 1993-1994 was a painful year for me. And unless you've been there or are now, it is really hard to understand the feeling of isolation and desperation that accompanies it. 

I didn't know WHO I was, and was desperately trying to. I knew who everyone else thought I was. I knew who everyone else wanted me to be. (Parents, Teachers, Coaches, Faculty, Administration, Friends, etc…) Which, in my mind, translated to what I was supposed to be. The problem was, it wasn't me. It was someone else's version of me. I couldn't articulate that thought then like I can now. 20 plus years of reflection can offer clarity like that. So now I spend my time working with high school and college students who are where I was. I work with them, so that they don't have to go through what I did.

They are standing in the midst of real struggle.

Emotional. Relational. Educational…struggle.

All of it, and more.

As a college freshman, it didn't take long for me to connect with a group of people who were willing to let me be me…or so I thought. Did they have my best interests at heart? No. Looking back, did they really know me at all? No. Then why was I so attracted to being around them, and neglecting my academics?

Because they offered me something I wanted.

A relationship.

Come here. Do this. Be part of "us". Do your thing. We value you, because of who you are. No conditions. No strings attached. (except there were) We'll "do life" together. Eat together. Play intramurals together. Road trip together. Everything…together. Until it gets hard. Then they were gone.

I so desperately wanted something that made sense as I struggled, that I took my eyes off of my future.

Let me be clear. It wasn't their fault. I can't and won't pass the blame. But my experience was real.

I knew I didn't want to be all the things everyone else wanted me to be. I knew I was confused. I knew I had no clue what major I should choose. And I knew the distraction of being pursued by a group of people was giving me what I thought I needed.

But it wasn't. 

And the day I received "the letter", that became painfully clear. 

None. Not one…single…person from that group has ever reached out to me after I left the University.

Let that sink in.

It was one of the most isolating feelings I had and have ever experienced.

The good news?

This isn't where the story ended.

Actually, it's where it started.

And it's why I am writing to you today.

My story of struggle in college was over 20 years ago.

But for many college students…their story is happening right now.

And the feelings of isolation, confusion, desperation, etc…?

They are real. They are the same.

You may know someone going through them as we speak.

Your friend.

Your child.

You.

I want to invite you to keep reading as I share more of my story.

You aren't alone.

And before you leave, please take this encouragement with you. (Share it with someone if this isn't you)

You are uniquely gifted. You are talented. The world needs every, single ounce of who you are and the change only you can bring to us. You are creative, smart, and compassionate. I look forward to sharing with you on this journey. I will share my story, so that you feel empowered in yours. You will make it. You will bounce back, comeback, and use this setback as THE moment you launched yourself forward.

I believe in you, and so do many, many others.

Thanks for stopping by today.

I look forward to hearing your story, too.

I've held onto this story for a long time.

I've told it in bits and pieces, but never in it's entirety...

…until today.

I failed out of college.

It still hurts to write those words, and worse yet to read them back to myself.

But the hurt isn't a "feel sorry for me" hurt. It's a "I'm doing something about it" hurt. In the lives of those who need the advice, mentorship, and direction that can only come from the voice of someone who's been there. 

Spoiler alert…

I ended up graduating Cum Laude from another 4 year University.

The journey in between, and since, has taught me everything I will share with you. And I'm doing it, so that you can make it.

Because...


When you know WHO you are, you will know WHAT to do.

And one more thing...

You aren't a failure.

Maybe some of your choices are making you feel that way.
But...that word doesn't define WHO you are.
That word is simply a reminder that there is work to be done.
Work that you can do, so that you make it to where you want and need to go.

Failure isn't a permanent place.
It's a reminder that it's time to get to work
.

So let's do the work.

Keep coming back to this blog for starters. 
Just read.
Take in some encouragement.
Start there.
One step at a time.

We'll talk more soon.

I've got a lot of stories from my journey I am going to share with you.

Until then...

-Brett

0 Comments

    Author

    From the desk of our founder, Brett W. Gould.

    Archives

    December 2016
    November 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    January 2016
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014

    RSS Feed

    Categories

    All
    Academics
    Accountability
    Adjust
    Advertising
    All-In
    Answer
    Apologize
    Argument
    Articulate
    Athletic Director
    Attention
    Authentic
    Authenticity
    Authority
    Ben & Jerry's
    Best Of Intentions
    Boundaries
    Brainstorming
    Brand
    Branding
    Business
    Calling
    Campus Life
    Challenge
    Challenges
    Change
    Chaos
    Circumstances
    Coach
    Coaching
    College
    College Athletics
    College Degree
    College Sports
    Comeback
    Commencement
    Commit
    Commitment
    Competition
    Conent Marketing
    Confidence
    Conflict
    Conflict Resolution
    Confrontation
    Confrontations
    Constructive
    Contentment
    Control
    Conversation
    Conversations
    Corkboard
    Critical Thinking Skills
    Cultural Change
    Culture
    Culture Building
    #CultureChange
    Decision
    Decision Making
    Decisions
    Delay
    Destination
    Destiny
    Destructive
    Detour
    Discover
    Disney
    Distraction
    Donate
    Donation
    Doubt
    Drop-Out
    Edchat
    Education
    Employee Engagement
    Encouragement
    Enrollment
    Excellence
    Excuse
    Excuses
    Expectant
    Experience
    Facebook
    Fail
    Failure
    Family
    Fear
    Feedback
    Filter
    First Year
    Focus
    Followers
    Freshman
    Future
    Generosity
    Giving
    Global Change
    Graduation
    Gratefulness
    Happiness
    Higher Ed
    Higher Education
    Hire
    Hiring
    Honor
    Idea
    Ideation
    Impact
    Influence
    Influencer Marketing
    Innovate
    Innovation
    Instagram
    Intentional
    Interruption
    #InTheClassroom
    #InTheCommunity
    InvestInRest
    Journey
    Knowledge
    Lead
    Leader
    Leadership
    Leadership Training
    Lessons
    Leverage
    Life
    Lifestyle
    Listening
    Love
    #LoveWins
    MagicBands
    Mario Kart
    Marketing
    Meetings
    #MentalCoaching
    Mental Coaching
    Mentor
    Millennial
    Millennial Generation
    Millennials
    Ministry
    Momentum
    NAIA
    NCAA
    NCCAA
    Obstacle
    Obstacles
    #OnTheField
    Opinion
    Opinions
    Opportunity
    Order
    Organization
    #OwnTheDelay
    Parents
    Passion
    Patience
    Persistence
    Perspective
    Picking A Major
    Player Development
    Playing Time
    Potential
    Practice
    Preference
    Preparation
    Problem
    Problem Solving
    Process
    Productivity
    Progress
    Purpose
    Pushback
    Question
    Race
    Recruit
    Recruiting
    Recruitment
    Reflections
    Relational
    Relationship
    Relationships
    Retain
    Retention
    Risk
    Sacrifice
    Serious
    #ServantLeadership
    Serve
    Service
    Setback
    Set-back
    Settle In
    Settling
    Shift
    Situation
    Situations
    Soccer
    #SocialMedia
    Social Media
    Social Media Marketing
    Solution
    Sports
    Staffing
    Start
    Status Quo
    Story
    Storytelling
    Structure
    Struggle
    Stuck
    Student
    Student Athlete
    Student-Athlete
    Students
    Substance
    Success
    Sustainable
    Sustenance
    Systems
    Team
    Temp Agency
    Temporary Staffing
    Temporary Staffing Agencies
    Temporary Staffing Agency
    Temptations
    Tension
    #ThatMuchMore
    Time
    Train
    Training
    Transaction
    Transactions
    Transparency
    Truth
    Twitter
    Universities
    University
    Values
    Vision
    Vision Statement
    Volunteer
    Website
    Whiteboard
    WHOBIX
    Winning
    Work
    You

Brett W. Gould
Culture Coach
​@BrettWGould on Twitter, Instagram, & Facebook

WHOBIX
5 Center Street
Fredonia NY 14063
716-672-9661

Photos used under Creative Commons from Richard Hsu, LindsayEnsing, hang_in_there, symphony of love, heyexit, h3h, Sharon & Nikki McCutcheon, TechStage, Phil Grondin, Lynn Rainard, marfis75, studieforbund_vofo, Kris Krug, sun dazed, seaternity, FindYourSearch, Bryn B Jones, garryknight, Jonathan Rolande, optikfluffel, yesbikes, mikecogh, ierdnall, VIVOBAREFOOT, Filter Forge, bjornmeansbear, Alan O'Rourke, eekim, filipecastilhos, juhansonin, Tony Webster, Phil Roeder, sanickels, Gruenewiese86, Hernan Piñera, Brett Jordan, quinn.anya, Ms. June Franks, free photos for you, eschipul, Monica Arellano-Ongpin, yachtrent, State Farm, mikecogh, promoterest, MorboKat, jordyferket, roland, bambe1964, Marcus Q, CJS*64 A man with a camera, mlinksva, wjarrettc, Wiertz Sébastien, Celestine Chua, Raymond Bryson, wwarby, dno1967b, A_Peach, Nithi clicks, built4love.hain, Gamma-Ray Productions, Naoki Ishii, Tela Chhe, star5112, Celestine Chua, pavlinajane, Paco Espinoza Photography, ☺ Lee J Haywood, MIKI Yoshihito (´・ω・), quinn.anya, Russ2009, Straycat207, RaSeLaSeD - Il Pinguino, DebMomOf3, jeffdjevdet, steffy., rick, quinn.anya, katerha, mripp, www.geteverwise.com, Jeffrey, Tony Webster, richardha101, liam_swinney, HALDANE MARTIN, Maura Teague, AdamKR, districtinroads, bumeister1